The Age of Cilantro

There seem to be more and more signs that I am getting older. Everywhere I look there is a sense that things are changing. The new music that comes out I don't get. Much like my parents didn't understand the music I used to listen to, the music of today seems useless and loud. Sonic garbage hurled at a microphone and bought up by angst ridden teens with too much make-up, they swipe their credit cards and then text mesage their friend who is behind them in line "I'm in frnt of u lol l8tr lmao," I can clearly see that the person at the front of the line is not laughing their ass off, they didn't even laugh out loud. Not to say music was especially good when I was growing up, I found myself turning to the classics at their age. The classics meaning, the Doors, Beatles, Hendrix, Creedence, Queen, probably stuff that I had seen on VH1 behind the music. But hey it was a start and I was only a teenager so I wasn't really hip to the underground scene my connections to music were those dreaded cable stations and the radio. I have to say that I didn't turn out too badly considering the limited avenues presented to me at that age (my parents didn't listen to music, unless you count the Carpenters or John Denver). But there were at least some modern artists that stood for something, or at least I thought at that time. I mean Rage against the machine was too loud for my parents, but that ear splitting yelling had meaning, the lyrics said something and it was perfect for all of that anger and sadness teens feel. "Fuck you I won't do what you tell me" even though this lyric was probably about government control and the orwellian conformity of a brain washed society, to me this meant I will take out the garbage when I feel like it and why does it matter if my room is messy, its my room!! These days of a seething anger boiling from within a teenage tortued soul have long passed and maybe that's why the music of today seems like it's not talking to me anymore. I hear modern rock and I think to myself, do you have to yell? Whatever happened to carrying a tune? But then even the ones that can carry a tune seem like they are spewing out crap as well. The whole emoting, whiny, bitch style of the modern pop-punk, indie rock scene grates on my nerves. I see them prancing around on music videos and whining, laying on the floor writhing in pain while they cry and eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, because another girl has left them, or is it always the same girl?

Hip hop which I had a love-hate relationship with in my youth was the best way to get away from the commerciality of the modern music scene in my later years. Now when I first started listening to hip hop it was people like Young Mc or LL cool J. That let's have fun, light hearted kinda rapping, then i moved on to Dre and Snoop. THey come from the lets shoot people and brag about our chains kind of place. I stopped listening to rap after the first Chronic came out, I started listening to Stone Temple Pilots, Nirvana, and Aerosmith. Then after years and year saway I came back to Hip Hop during the 2pac, Biggie, Bad Boy era, with some Mos Def, Talib, and Roots thrown in there and I listened to commercial rap until the end of high school. But in college I discovered the underground. These people made more sense to me, their lyrics weren't the same tired laundry list of vices and bank accounts. They were what is now popularly known as "conscious" which I guess means that they actually have something to say, they use their heads. It was good to listen to people who were better than the people on the radio but who couldn't get played because their lyrics had meaning. Aesop Rock, Atmosphere, Blackalicious, Typical Cats, the list goes on and on. So these artists struggled, they talked abou things that I could related to and they had a love for the culture of hip hop that was palpable through the earphones. It wasn't about the money or the fame it was about the message and the love of the culture and the art. These artists were the antithesis of what was wrong with modern commercial rap. They made listening to the radio painful, watching music videos was a comedy show. So all through college we hoarded these artists we protected them from the harsh realities of a commercail enviornment that would not welcome them. And this is where my age comes into play. Blackalicious has been in a Saturn commercail, a Pepsi commercial and a Yahoo commercial. Lyrics Born has been in a Pepsi commercial and if you look at the soundtrack to NBA 2k6 you will see almost 18 tracks of underground artists on there. I was watching tv the other day and almost started crying when an And1 shoe commercial came on and it was Atmosphere playing in the background. Now I am not mad at these people for finding commercial success I am just saying that I am officially old. The artists that I thought would be mine forever, go undiscovered and serve as warriors against commerciality have become commercial. It is a selfish thing to try and hold on to artists that you have watched grow over the years, I'm sure people felt the same way about every "Buzz worthy" band on mtv but it happens and it means you aren't cool anymore and you are old. I was looking at my little cousins Ipod and I saw tons of artists that I had no idea he would listen to or that he would have even heard of. So These artists are finally being accepted by the commercial public, they have that MTV stamp of approval which means that they are no longer underground and I listen to the same music as a 12 year old. Which I guess is good because it is good music, but it will kill me when I hear a little girl say that she loves Sage Francis or "Did you see that new Zion I video on TRl?" Looking back on this passage it contradicts everything I said earlier about commercial music being unbearable, but there is a difference between not being able to listen to commercial music and the music you listen to becoming commercial right?

The shows that I watch on T.V. make me think I am getting older too. I watch the same kind of shows that I would hate watching when i was younger. Dateline NBC rules!! That and 60 minutes, Meet The Press, Law and Order, the history channel, Dixcovery. Just add Diagnosis Murder and Matlock and you have the viewing schedule of a 60 year old. My favorite channel used to be MTV, now it is a painful looking glass into what is wrong with the youth and television as a whole. My radio stations are on the AM dial, newsradio and NPR. Sports talk and traffic reports, instead of alternative rock and rap. "The kids drive by with their booming systems, I must be getting old cuz the bass sounds ridiculous, everybodies biting 2pac so fuck it I'm gonna stand over here and do the moonwalk." This is a line by Slug and it mirrors my thoughts as well. The rumbling windows from a set of 12's in these kidas cars sounds horrible, it used to be me sitting in my old car with the blown out speaker trying to vibrate the car next to me, now I am like my mom, "It's too lud, the car is rumbling." Subdued in age, angst gone, the sublties of life more enjoyable at a quieter level.

I eat cilantro now, tomatoes don't disgust me and eggs taste good. My palette is getting older, candy is too sweet, and sushi is my favorite food. The changes from childhhod to now pile upon each other creating a wobbly tower of growth and the relandscaping of persona. I guess it's natural, it all comes with age, I just never thought I would like cilantro.